the (un)death of Nemo

Juma's long time fish friend, Nemo, a member of the Beckham household for two years, died today, Wednesday. Freeing him from his confined tupperware dish we bought him in, we gave this blue-and-black Siamese fighting fish a filtered tank, a plant, and a name. The then two-and-a-half -year-old Juma enthusiastically named his first pet Nemo; it was the only fish name Juma had ever heard. Within two days, clever Nemo learned to dance near the surface to request food. He didn't stink, bark, shed, scratch, mess up the floor, mark his territory, cause allergies, or try to sleep on our faces in the middle of the night. He was a good pet.


After his bath tonight, we told Juma that his pet beta had died. He first denied that Nemo was dead, insisting he was only resting. But reality set in, and Juma became angry. When we said he could get another pet if he wanted, he countered that "Another pet will just die too! I don't like pets. They just die." I tried to explain that even though death and missing his pet is sad, those two years we did have with Nemo were fun and happy, so it was worth it.

Next, Juma wanted to keep Nemo anyway, but explained the his body needs to return to the earth. With some crying and talking, he decided he wanted to take Nemo to the ocean, "back where he came from," say goodbye, then go to the pet store and get another one just like him and name him Nemo too.

[crying] "I want to get another fish, okay? 'Cause I like fishes. One just like Nemo."

Thursday morning Update:

Nemo: I'm not dead yet! I want to go for a walk. I'm soo happy!

Woops--Nemo's not dead. But I'm pretty sure he's really close. He's been lying on the bottom of the tank lethargically for several days, moving only rarely, and not dancing for food anymore. We discovered he wasn't dead when, in preparation to take Nemo to the beach for a funeral, Justin tried to get the fish out of the tank with a net. Juma was all ready to say goodbye and wanted to take him to the ocean anyway, but we told him we'd better wait, since putting him in the cold salt water would kill him.

overheard in the playground

Do you guys want to play with me?

Sure. What do you want to play?

Sea animals. But you have to be a carnivore. Because I'm a carnivore, I'm a shark, and if you're not, I'll eat you. So you better be a carnivore. Either a shark or a killer whale.

I'll be a killer whale.

Okay, we'll both be killer whales. Let's swim!

____

Juma: Guys, guys, come here, I want to show you something.

What?

Juma: I have...soccer shoes! See? They have cleats to hold on to, um, to hold on to, the, um, ground.

_____

Juma: You have to exercise a lot. And eat sports candy [fruits and veggies].

Friend: Yeah. To be healthy.

Juma: Then you'll be big and strong. See, feel my muscles.

Friend: Wow, you're strong. Feel my muscles.

children's museum

For a Saturday afternoon outing, we took Juma to the local children's museum, where they have, among other things, a room designed after the room in Good Night Moon.

Juma played in the music room.


And in the math /puzzles room.

at the park

We went to a park the other day for the apartment Turkey Bowl.

on whining and sleeping in

Saturday morning, Justin's turn:

Juma wakes up at 6:30 and calls out "Dad!" from his bedroom. Justin tells him he can get out of bed, turn on the light, and play quietly in his room until 7.

He does so.

At 7, he calls Justin again. Justin tells him, "Okay, go pee, then get dressed."

He does so. He walks up to Justin and says, "I didn't even whine!"

Sarah sleeps in.


Sunday morning, Sarah's turn:

Juma wakes up at 7:15 and calls out "Mom!" I call from the living room couch, where I slept because I was coughing all night, "Okay, go pee, then get dressed."

Juma starts to whine and continues whining for an hour. "I don't want to get dressed! I don't like to get dressed! I need help! Come with me! I don't know if the shirt is backwards! I hate putting on my pants!" Finally, after 8, he gets dressed and acts like nothing happened.

Justin tries to sleep in.

happy thanksgiving!

It's a little weird to be so far away from any family, since I'm used to having Thanksgiving with about 40 relatives, but this is our fourth year like this. We're getting together with two other couples and their kids we've known for three years, which makes this the biggest Thanksgiving we've had in New Haven.

Sarah: I'm thankful for family, friends, life, and this beautiful world.

Juma: I'm thankful for my friends.

Justin: [still sleeping]

HPAA

Hi, my name is Sarah, and I'm a Harry Potter Addict. (Everyone: Hi, Sarah.)

How else would I know that the trailer for movie 5 is out? Check it out at the Happy Feet movie page (or by going to see Happy Feet in the theater).

But don't get your hopes up. The movie doesn't come out until July.

And in case you are wondering, release date and title have not been announced for Book 7. But stores are beginning to advertise it all the same...

old enough? definitive version

So, Sarah wrote about a conversation we had in the car today and completely mis-remembered everything with her own truthiness version that put me in a bad light. I'll forgive her this time, but I have to set the record straight with the "true" version (no truthiness involved, I promise). :)

Justin: Juma, when are you going to be old enough to do cool stuff with me like go paintballing?

Juma: When I'm seven.

Sarah: What? No way, seven?

Justin: I was that young when I got my first BB gun.

Sarah: I don't believe you--we'll call your Mom when we get home.

Justin: You call her and she'll say I was 15 just to make herself look like a better Mom!

Sarah: Seven's way too young.

Juma: Okay, nine.

Sarah: He's way too young, he'll cry when he gets hit by the paintball.

Justin: It doesn't hurt very much, Juma. Don't worry, you just have to make noises like, "Arrrrggghhh!" when it hits you. [Notice, please, that I said nothing of being a "man" or being "manly." Way too cliche.]

Juma: Arrrrgggggghhhhh!

Sarah: It still hurts.

Juma: Have you ever played paintball, Mom?

Sarah [sheepishly]: No.

Juma: Dad, have you ever played?

Justin: Yes.

Juma: Did it hurt?

Justin: Not very much.

Juma: See mom, you are a genius!

Either Juma was being sarcastic or he thinks genius means someone who pretends to know something she couldn't possibly know firsthand....

Now you can read Sarah's version. Keep in mind that anyone that spells it bee-bee gun automatically loses all credibility. Even if she edits her post to show things like this or this.

Memory is something I'm spending a lot of time on lately--it is a big part of the upcoming orals section of my PhD. I'm becoming more and more convinced that memory is more "created" than "recorded." (And yes, I create just as much as Sarah does.)

Do any of you have conversations that one person remembers totally differently than the other?

old enough?

Driving along old Boston Post Road today, Juma and Justin discussed paint ball guns. Juma announced that he'd be old enough to have a paint ball gun when he's seven. This playful conversation ensued:

Sarah: Seven? I don't think so.

Juma: Yes! Seven!

Justin: Seven's old enough, isn't it?

Sarah: Noooo. Seven year olds aren't even old enough to not cry when the paint ball hits.

Justin: Well, he'll learn to take it like a man. Juma, when you get hit, you can't cry. You just say, all manly, Arrggh!

Sarah: He can learn to be a man when he's older and the paint ball hits.

Juma: Okay, fine, nine. I can when I'm nine. I promise! When I'm nine, okay?

Justin: I had a bee-bee gun when I was seven.

Sarah: Oh, bull.

Justin: I'm pretty sure it was seven.

Sarah: I'm asking your mother.

Justin: Whatever. Juma, it doesn't hurt even hurt.

Sarah: Doesn't hurt? It leaves welts. Anything that leaves welts hurts.

Justin: It doesn't hurt.

Sarah: Juma, it hurts.

Juma: Dad, does it hurt?

Justin: No.

Juma: Mom, you are a genius!

We bust out laughing and because we expected Juma to say, "Mom, you are a liar." Turns out Juma got the word genius from an audio CD of Toy Story. Woody tells Buzz, "The window! Buzz, you are a genius." Juma's also been quoting, "You are a sad, strange little man."

know-it-all

I know everything in the world.

No, you don't.

Yes, I do.

No, you don't.

Yes, I do.

What's 10+12?

That's the only thing I don't know. It's...uh,...15 million!

willkommen

Juma's cousin, Ammon, and my sister, Jody, arrived in Utah from Germany on Thursday night. Willkommen! It's amazing how close and how far away they can be at the same time. I think Germany might actually be as close to us as Utah is. When we head out to Utah after Christmas, Juma will be able to play with both Ammon and Ethan, both cousins within 7 weeks of his age. Juma really wants to go to Chuck-e-Cheese's with them. What do you say, Jody and Randall? (Just avoid the pizza at all costs. It tastes worse than a shoe sole dipped in rotten tomatoes. I would think.)

I think this is the most recent picture we have of Juma and Ammon together, and it's two years old. The most recent one we have of all three of the stooges, Juma, Ethan, Ammon, is from their first Christmas when they were infants. (Is that true?)

toys

Juma had to get creative with toys in Zanzibar last summer. We brought only a couple toys with us, such as this glow stick, above. In the lower picture, he's playing with a thrown-out piece of electronic equipment, I think. He was pretending it was a remote control (not that there was a TV). And of course the soccer ball was the most favorite toy for Juma and all his friends. And any adult men walking by.

chores, and forever

Yesterday: Juma asked if he can go outside to play. I said, "Sure, but sweep under the table first." Then I gave him my "I'm just teasing" smile. He responded with a smile that showed he knew I was teasing. He then went to the broom closet, pulled out the broom and dust pan, and started sweeping. And he actually did it right. That is, a pile of garbage and dust bunnies actually made it into the garbage can, rather than just getting pushed around.

Today: He sat on the toilet, counting. He counted all the way to 100, while a little help from me for the tens (fifty, sixty, etc). He then said, "I'm done. That's all the counting." I explained how he can go further. He got to 110. "That's it. That's all the counting," he said. I told him it's possible to count forever.

"Forever? Forever?"
"Yes, forever."
"Like all day? Like all day and all night?"

guitar

Last night before bed, Juma pulled out his "guitar," a racquetball racquet, and serenaded us. Strumming away on the strings, he sang about a chair, a forehead, and an acorn. He has a musical preference for "fast music," rap, hip hop, and hard rock. These songs took on a 4-year-old's version of hard rock.

"I have a chair, oh yeah, oh yeah.
It is for sitting on, oh yeah, oh yeah.
Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah!"

"There once was an acorn, oh yeah
It fell on the ground, oh yeah
It was so happy that it---"

He was at a loss for words on what an acorn on the ground could do when happy. I suggested that maybe it could grow into a tree. But he disagreed; an acorn that's not buried can't grow into a tree.

This morning he brought the guitar out again, and asked, "Mom, when I grow up, will you buy me a guitar? I really want a guitar." I told him that perhaps when we are in Utah, he could play a little on Grandpa's guitar, and see how he likes playing a real guitar.

"But I already know everything about playing guitar. I already know. I saw it on TV." He then proceeded to play some more, asking me to sing along the ABCs. Jamming away, he took a quick break in the middle of playing to mime tuning a string.

as time goes by

You know how you think of people as a certain age, frozen in time, but they just keep on aging, defying all doesn't-the-world-revolve-around-me-ness? Like how I still think of Aunt April as 33 and Aunt Danelle as 27. I don't really know why those ages froze in my mind. Maybe it was the first time I asked how old they were, and then I lost track. Now I'm 27.

And how my sister Melissa is 12 in my mind, because that's how old she was when I moved out. But now she's married and has a baby. Andria is 15, and Cameron 17, the ages when I first met them (I think). Nephew Isaac is 5, and his little brother Xander is 3 (they're actually 7 and 5).

Then there's how people feel an age, when their real age may be something entirely different. I'm been trying to pinpoint what age I feel, and I can't do it. I've tried determining my internal age before, and I couldn't do it then either. What does that mean? I'm not in touch with myself? Or I haven't reached my internal age yet?

look alike contest

My sister Melissa recently commented that Juma looks like Eric Lloyd, the kid from The Santa Clause movies. And Juma's teachers at school volunteered that he looks like Haley Joel Osment, famous for that movie that disturbed the wits out of me, The Sixth Sense.

So I'm taking a poll among all ya'll. (No, they don't say all ya'll in Connecticut, but I have a good friend from North Carolina. And she might say it. And my mom and my other good friend are from Texas. And I'm sure they don't say it. But they are from Texas. So that's my excuse.)

Which is it? Haley or Eric? (Or submit another name.) Not great pictures, I know, but you can find more through a google search.

Post your vote in comments. If you post using the "anonymously" option, just sign with your name in the comments box. Unless you want to post anonymously.

elections? what's elections?

No, I won't get into a political post, since I figure our political views clash with, oh, 90% of our readers. So I'll just leave that be.

But around dinner time we did turn on the TV to see how the House, Senate, and Connecticut races were going. That was unusual for Juma, because we rarely watch TV, and we generally do not let Juma watch TV during the week. (We "save up" his restricted TV-time for Saturday and Sunday morning cartoons, so we can sleep in a little. It doesn't really count, but it saves our sanity.)

Juma quickly got bored with political analysts, and asked Justin to change the channel. So instead of keeping up with the tight races, I heard Juma's running commentary on a monster truck rally.

Juma: Whoa! He fell over! Is he hurt? Dad, is he hurt?
Justin: No, he's fine.
Sarah: Gives Justin a look that says, Why are you letting him watch this stuff?
Juma: jumping up and down in excitement Wow! A pirate one! A pirate truck! It's a real pirate one, Mom! Look, he has a pirate flag! He's a real pirate. He is!
Juma notices Justin is holding the remote control
Juma: Don't change the channel. Stop. I want to watch this.
Justin: I'm just holding it, Juma, I'm not pushing the button.
Juma: Okay. Don't change it. I want to watch the trucks. (says trucks in a manly voice)

All right, so I probably made up half of that dialogue. But you get the idea. Lieberman-Lamont Senate race; Rell-de Stefano govenor race, whatever. We've got monster trucks!

learning new words. sort of.

Sarah: Juma, you get to have pizza twice today! Once at home, once at your friend's party.
Juma: No, I get to have pizza thrice.
Sarah: Thrice?
Juma: That means three times.

Juma: I have four favorite ice creams. No five.
Sarah: What are they?
Juma: Green apple. Chocolate. Vanilla. And I can't remember.
Sarah: What about mint chocolate?
Juma: Oh, yeah, that's my fifth favorite. Fifth? Does that mean five?
Sarah: Yes. What's your fourth favorite?
Juma: I don't know.

travel plans

We've bought tickets to visit family in Utah the week after Christmas. It'll be fun to see everyone again, and it will be interesting to have Christmas "alone" for the first time. We have some friends out here in CT, though, so we won't be too lonely.

Friends and extended family: If you will be in Utah end of December/beginning of January, do let us know. We'd love to meet up. Contact us for exact dates.

Halloween

First off, happy (late) birthday to Cameron K, who shares his birthday with Halloween.

The weather was perfect for trick-or-treating: cool, but not so cold that kids had to wear coats over their costumes. Juma loved going door-to-door, and we hit maybe 30 doors this year before he got tired. That's up from 5 last year.

Just like last year and the year before, Juma was a dinosaur. And he wanted the jack-o-lantern to have a scary face...even though it scared Juma.










"I want Halloween to be every, every day."